I think we’ve all gone after that one guy or girl who plays you. And what I mean by “playing you”, is that they act completely differently when they’re with you than when they’re not: Whether you run into them the next day– out with another girl– or they just never hit your line again.
It always leaves you wondering if you’re crazy and made the whole story up… or maybe they’re just fucked up. Like that one guy who says he wants to date you and you guys hook up. And then he doesn’t text you for days. Or recently, I had a fun one where I went to dinner with a guy and had been hanging with him, only to see him out the following night with another girl. Now don’t get me wrong: I know I can get another guy in a second, as can you. But there’s something about the one who doesn’t treat you like you know you should be treated, that just gets to you. It fucks with your ego. And it gets you asking yourself a million questions. I’m not going to sit here and pretend like I haven’t been into these guys before or that they haven’t hurt my feelings. But an incredibly helpful thing I learned, that has helped me to be much less affected when people like this walk into my life, is to never take anything personally. When someone doesn’t text you back even though you think you guys might have something– or when you see them out with someone else– you need to remember it has nothing to do with you. Someone else’s actions don’t relate to you… they relate to them. Their actions are the result of something going on in their life. It doesn’t mean that you’re not great, it honestly doesn’t even mean they’re not into you! But humans are fucking complicated. I know in the past when I haven’t texted a guy back, even when maybe I appeared to be into him, it was usually because I was going through something or it didn’t fit me in that moment.
You’re going to go through this many times in your life. I think it’s just important to remember that this too will pass. And that at least you guys weren’t married with kids or something. A player plays people and runs through people’s’ feelings for many reasons. It’s usually the result of trust issues or maybe being too immature. Or perhaps they’re just afraid of what they actually want. This post isn’t about changing them: after all, you can’t change anyone but yourself. But it’s about not being so affected when someone does play you and fucks you over…. And how to move on. And maybe next time to be more aware of what you’re getting yourself into. If someone isn’t making a conscious effort to hang with you and be good to you, then fuck them! You deserve better.