Every week our writers share a bit of themselves with you. Inspired by their vulnerability, we sat some of our core team members down for an intimate interview.
We chatted with Bri Scripture, our in-house graphic designer who generates Ā visuals for the website, social media, and Killer And A Sweet Thang’s events. She is currently studying design in New York City, andĀ in addition to her 2D work, she’s begun to explore animation and motion graphics.
Where are you from originally?
Bri: Richmond, Virginia.
Do you think your family dynamic growing up has influenced your work in any way?
I think it really informed my relationships now. How I view my future and myself with other people because of growing up with a single mom, and not really having any men around for my most formative years. It being my mom and I, thatās a lot of femme energy. I think definitely not having to answer to any men and not having a father figure, that has changed the way that I act and things that I care about. I think that I probably have daddy issues, which is a recent development.
I mean, itās part of growing up where you’re just like, ‘I have baggage!’
You know how people always make fun of daddy issues? And Iām like, Oh wait though…Ā
How did you get involved in KAAST?
Through social media, which really speaks to how KAAST works. Iād been following both @birds.bees and Eileen and there was a post about needing help and Iād always been interested in this type of work so I thought, why not?
Can you tell the readers a little bit about what you do for Killer And A Sweet Thang?
I feel like it started out as just finding content, but as it turns out there was a space for me to be doing design, which is my biggest passion, and being able to use my design for the causes that I care about. This is such a small team so we all have to play a bigger role, but mainly I do graphic design.
Whatās your favorite part about graphic design?
I think my favorite part is when I’m on the computer andāthis is a blessing and a curseāyou can do anything that you want. You have all these tools.Ā
Now some fun stuff. Do you prefer dating apps or IRL?
In real life.
Handjob or oral?
Oral.
Sub or dom?
Sub.
Sex on the first date?
It depends, but I’m in favor.
What turns you on?
Big dick energy, humor.
How would you define big dick energy?
I would say big dick energy is just like confidence in who you are. [BDE] can manifest itself in many different ways, and itās ok if you don’t have it, I don’t have it. I don’t have big dick energy. It’s fine.Ā I took a quiz and it told me I didn’t, so.
What! Where is the quiz?
I was a zero percent on Buzzfeed.
No, you did not get zero percent?
I got a whole zero.Ā
What turns you off?
Someone thatās super conservative. When we don’t vibe, if I don’t feel comfortable around youāthatās a turnoff for me.Ā
Have you ever been ghosted or ghosted someone?
Yes, it’s a bad habit.
Which way?
Me ghosting somebody.
Why did you ghost somebody?
Sometimes I’m just really bad at confrontation, for whatever reason, and then I feel so guilty that I just have to run away.
Have you ever been ghosted?
Yes, but then I always receive clarity at some point. I seek out clarification of the ghosting.
Do you like dirty talk?
Yeah. I think itās necessary, for me.
Do you send nudes?
Circumstantially.
What a concise answer. Do you have any advice on taking them?
I think whatās most important is not forcing it. If youāre feeling sensual, if youāre feeling yourself,Ā thatās the perfect time. But if youāre not feeling good about yourself that dayāand thatās totally fineāthen maybe itās not the day for it. But I think feeling comfortable, feeling good, working your angles.Ā Just get that shot, ya know?
Whatās the worst thing a former partner has said to you?
The thing that probably hurt the most was being told that I was a different and changed person in a bad way.
And how did you respond to that?
I felt more like that was his problem. In retrospect, maybe I was kind of being someone that wasnāt true to myself, but that wasnāt necessarily his place to say that about me. I was like, whatever youāre thinking, thatās just what you’re deflecting onto me. I just think you donāt like the person I am now.
Do you find it hard to connect to people in the digital age?
Yeah. It feels like so often it’s the source of all our confusion. So much is based on if somebody texted you back and how they texted you back. This whole digital thing, itās like weāve got two versions of life. I think it complicates things, especially with relationships and dating.
How do you deal with rejection?
I do not take it well at all. I have this whole thing, and I’m trying to work on this, where Iām like, who would reject me? What’s wrong with me? So I have this new perspective that how people feel about you sometimes has nothing to do with you. Itās just their perspective that they’ve placed on you. So I try to let go.
Do you have any advice on letting go?Ā
Sometimes you just have to continue telling yourself to get over it until it happens. With social mediaāunfollowing, muting, whatever you need to doābecause the little reminders can make it so much worse. Just accepting the rejection over and over. Like it’s fine, thatās what that person thinks, and thereās nothing I can do about that.
Have you ever lied to get out of a sexual situation?
Yes, countless.
Can you give us one of the lies youāve used?
I feel like theyāre all pretty regular, like sometimes I’m like,Ā “Oh I started cooking before I left, so I need to go finish my noodles.” Iāve said that before.
Really? Like you’ve insinuated that you’ve left on the boiler?
I guess thatās what I was saying. I was like, “Oh, I started cooking,”Ā and I was nearby so it maybe made sense.
Why do you think you felt the need to lie?
Sometimes itās a pure defense thing. You feel [as though] this person is not going to let off unless you have a real reason.Ā Sometimes itās hard to be assertive, or you want to turn them down now but you want them to know youāre still open to it in the future. I think often itās just me having a hard time articulating how I feel.
Would you say youāre a good kisser?
Honestly, I don’t even know. Sometimes I feel like Iām killing it and sometimes Iām like, Oh, no.Ā
Whatās the kinkiest thing you’ve ever done in bed? And you can plead the fifth if you want to.
Iām pleading the fifth.
Have you ever been in love?
I think so.
Have you ever been heartbroken?
Yes.
How did you get over it?
Honestly, I feel like, do we ever get over heartbreak? I don’t know if we ever do.
So thereās some people out there you’re still thinking about?
Yeah. I never have a linear healing process. Itās always all over the place. Some days I feel like Iām good, and then some days Iām like, Oh no, this is totally repressed and I need to handle it.
Do you have any advice for young people navigating dating and sex in 2018?
My biggest thing is to follow your gut instinct, be as transparent as possible, and to always put yourself first. And donāt ever question your value and your worth at the hands of someone else. Ā