What The Body Positivity Movement Means To Me

*All photos by Ashley Armitage. 

 

The other day a boy asked me for my thoughts on the body positivity movement. After expressing my support for the movement, he went on to claim that he believed it was ‘unhealthy,’ and a way to encourage women to become or remain obese. He said that women being oversized was not something to be celebrated. This got me wondering: What does body positivity mean to me, and was there a direct correlation between our size and our physical health?

As a child, I consistently struggled with my body and my image. By 8, I was already comparing myself to girls who were skinnier than me. By 13, I started starving myself, depriving my body of the nourishing food that it needed. I was surviving off an apple a day—ironically, bringing the doctor closer my way. By 16, I tried to become bulimic, mostly because I was now sick of denying myself food. I was in pain and in a continuous battle with the mirror, resisting my physical and spiritual being.

My insecurities held me back from so many things. I had this idea in my head that all people would see, all they could see were the bigger parts of me. That these parts stood out and separated me from everybody else. This began to hinder my ability to do whatever it is teenagers do, and most importantly infringed on my perception of self-love. I didn’t understand what it meant to love myself, and my only idea of what it meant to be healthy was to be thin.

Looking back I realize how much I wish I could’ve spoken to myself, and told the past me that it would be okay, that I was already healthy. I wish I had known that depriving my body was not the answer, and that repeatedly enforcing negative thoughts upon myself was only preventing my mind and body from healing its wounds.

Body positivity and the movement it has created translates into something much more powerful than what the boy referred to as ‘unhealthy.’ The truth is, the movement and concept did not evolve in order to encourage women to live unhealthy lifestyles, but rather to help us understand and love our bodies. It encourages us to make transform our self-image rather than to conform or fit into the unrealistic body expectations that social media says we must idealize. It’s also showed us the importance of prioritizing a healthy and nurturing relationship with these beautiful life-giving vehicles, rather than straining or even shaming them.

The increasing representation of women of all shapes, colors, and sizes within society has reminded me of just how diverse and abundant this world is. Instead of dwelling on our flaws or what we perceive to be ugly, we should celebrate the skin that we are in. It is okay and wonderful to love yourself, and to the live the most fulfilling life, and to do so because you choose to.

Today, I am almost 19 year-old, and while I still find myself struggling, there’s a difference in knowing that I am definitely not alone.